I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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