quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Randomize
