I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
