There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
