ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
