Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
