Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize