As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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