Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
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