So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
