Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
