I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
operation harelip BJ is a go
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
