Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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