ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
