What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize