oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Randomize
