Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Randomize
