Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
