I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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