he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
