ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
