Michael Bay diarrhea
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
