Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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