I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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