when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize