I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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