so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
