i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
