you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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