i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize