the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
