the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
