My sheets look like a crime scene.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
