And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
