Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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