Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
