I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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