She is in my trunk
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize