She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize