so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I would ride that face into the sunset
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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