I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
