My nipple is on Facebook.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize
