Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
did i just pee glitter
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
