I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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