What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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