stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Randomize
