just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Randomize
