I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
