I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
