If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
