her vagine was all disorganized.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
i out mim tonsoeep
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
